The Platter Exercise: How to Manage Your Stress, and the Stress of Others

At this current moment in time, there is a great deal of tension, stress and uncertainty in the world. Which is why it’s so important that you learn how to manage your stress and the stress of others. So today I’m sharing The Platter Exercise with you.

The Platter Exercise is an easy and important tool to keep handy in your stress management toolbox.

We’re all feeling the stress of the world right now.

And appropriately so, we’re turning to each other for support, counsel and a safe place to lean.

Yet, as much as you want to be there for others, you also want to ensure you’re not taking on other people’s stress, i.e. fears, angst, uncertainty.


There are a variety of tools I share with clients in my coaching practice, but one of my personal favorites is what I call, The Platter Exercise.

Imagine I’m holding out a beautiful ceramic, platter in front of me. (Feel free to design your own.)

As a friend, family member, or stranger in the grocery checkout line shares their thoughts, woes, opinions, fears, i.e. STRESS, I allow all of THAT STRESS to rest on the metaphoric platter I’m holding in front of me.

Go ahead, pile it on,” I think to myself.

I hold that platter for them, knowing it can grow in size to accommodate.

a platter to hold other's stress

Free Yourself from the Stress of Others

After all the stress, angst and uncertainty have been piled atop this metaphoric platter, that is the moment for you and your companion to assess, analyze and advise as necessary.

Or maybe not.

Often just sharing all their stress is enough for your friend, family member or grocery store stranger to relieve themselves of their burdens, at least temporarily.

But here is THE KEY to the entire Platter Exercise and a step that should never be missed!

This is the vital piece that will free you up from taking on the stress of others. 

When the “platter exchange” is complete; when all that STRESS on the platter has been held and examined, the entire contents of the platter go back to the owner.

Let me repeat – Everything on the platter goes back to the owner of the original stress.

That way, You do not take on the stress of others!!!

It’s Up to Them

Then it’s up to them.

Do they want to take all that stress back on?

Perhaps. It’s up to them. But it’s not yours to take on.

Do they want to “let it all go”?

Perhaps. To drop the entire platter? Pick and choose a few items to keep? Let it all fly away into the ethers?

Again, it’s up to them. Not YOU.

None of this is yours to take on.

You have enough of your own stuff to carry.

They can choose to take the stress back on, let it fly away, or whatever, BUT THEIR STRESS IS NOT YOURS TO TAKE ON!

You have enough of your own stress in your life to carry, right?

The Platter Exercise is a kind and loving way to be fully present to others; to hold and hear what they have to say and honor what is theirs (not yours).

It’s a way to send the message that you trust and believe in them so much, that you know they can manage their own stress.

And Now for Your Stress

It’s not healthy to take on the stress of others, right? Because you already have enough of your own to carry?

So I have another wonderful tool to alleviate yourself from your own stress and all the burdens you may carry.

You can download my helpful (and free) tool here –

The Overwhelm Solution: 3 Simple Steps to Move from Overwhelm to Ease

In many ways, it’s like The Platter Exercise, but designed to help manage your own stress, rather than others.

​As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the tools and techniques I’ve shared, as well any of your own that you’ve found successful.

I’d also love to connect over on Instagram. 

Many Blessings!

Ask a Life Coach Any Question – What Would it Be?

Have you ever wondered, if I could ask a Life Coach any question, what would it be?

Well I have wonderful news for you, today is your lucky day!

Because I am a Life Coach and I would love to hear your question.

I am open for business and declare that…

Today is Ask a Life Coach Your Question Day!

Most often, over here on the blog, I work to offer words that I hope you find uplifting, inspiring, and hopefully entertaining!

But today, rather than try an guess what you may need, I’m going to take a more direct approach and ask you directly.

What do you need?

In what areas of your life are you needing support?

Now is your big chance to ask a question that will offer you more clarity, support, balance and direction.















If you could ask me anything… about motherhood, writing a book, balancing life, work, relationships or ____________, or ______________ what would it be?

This is my offer to you.

What is the one question you’d like to ask?

The floor is yours.

Curious what it’s like to work with a Life Coach?

When we work together, I’m your partner in creating radical life-change. I’m just as committed to you living your dream life as you are.

Because I work from a holistic life coaching approach; meaning we examine all aspects of your life ~ physical, mental and emotional health, family and home life, career, financial well-being, life-partnerships and more, to discover areas of strength and weakness and how they all influence each other.

When one or more aspects of your life is “off” it has an impact on the wellness, wholeness and happiness of every area of your life.

As we touch on all aspects of your life and elevate your vibration, everything in your world elevates to match yours.

I approach my work from an intuitive life coaching perspective, utilizing my own advanced intuitive abilities and helping my clients develop their own.

When you’re able to more easily tap into your intuition, decision-making becomes easier and the path forward becomes more clear.

Because of this big picture approach, I often end up serving as a life and business coach for the women I work with.

Whether you’re struggling to find meaning in your career or want to find a way to have a bigger impact on the world, transformational life coaching will help.

Clients repeatedly report a new sense of freedom and possibility due to what they describe as my “uncanny ability to ‘see’ things that have been hidden beneath the surface” and holding them back.

If you’re intrigued and would like to explore my Life Coaching practice, you can schedule a complimentary 45-minute session here – Kasey Mathews Discovery Session 


Embrace Aging and Enjoy Life More

Aging has been on my mind lately. I’ve been thinking a lot about how to embrace aging and fully and truly enjoy life more at every age and stage.

Most often I publish my written pieces here on the blog, yet I was thrilled to have an article called, On Vanity and Vulnerability, in which I explore fears and anxieties around aging, published on

Here is a short excerpt –

“While recently looking into the round makeup mirror on the shelf in my closet, I noticed the emergence of vertical lines on my upper lip.

I don’t think they’re necessarily new, but my attention on them certainly is.

I started researching serums, creams, lotions and everything else I could do to remedy them.

Every time I looked in the mirror, they were the first, and nearly only thing I noticed.

On a recent walk in the woods, rather than seeing the evergreen on the trees and the brightness of the snow, I realized I was thinking about the lines on my upper lip.”

Feeling Vulnerable Sharing Anxiety about Aging

Putting those words out in the world induced feelings of great vulnerability and anxiety, and which, once you read the full article, you’ll understand how ironic that is.

And yet, after the article was published, I heard back from so many women who could relate to my struggles about aging and we’re so open and happy to share their own.

the photo that accompanied the article On Vanity and Vulnerability

It’s Time to Embrace Aging and Enjoy Life More

Once again I was reminded that there is so much comfort in knowing we are not alone.

Each and every day, we’re all a day older. For some of us, we’re farther along the path, and aspects of aging are challenging to contend with.

And yet, what a gift and blessing it is to wake each and every day, wrinkles and all!

You can read the article here – Kasey Mathews

I’ll look forward to hearing your thoughts and feedback.

You may also enjoy this recent post on How to Feel Better About Yourself!

An Alternative Word for Decluttering

It’s that time of year again when folks are starting to talk about decluttering their homes. But I always get stuck on the word “decluttering” and like to use an alternative word instead.

An Alternative Word for Decluttering

Instead, I prefer the term “Creating Space”, not wanting to unintentionally invite clutter in with the decluttering!  You know what I mean?

Years ago, when we first moved to New Hampshire, I was in complete overwhelm and hired a professional organizer to help me navigate my way through the myriad of boxes and belongings.

Uncertain what this process would be like, I assumed we would just start “decluttering” by throwing things away.

But that wasn’t true at all!

Instead, I learned so much from her, most importantly, the fundamental first step to creating an orderly home that I have used ever since!

One of My Favorite Decluttering Making Space Tips

Ready? Here it is:

Like goes with Like

Meaning, all the sports equipment is in one place. Everything photography related lives together. All the holiday decorations in one place. Gardening in another. Art supplies. Books. Office supplies. Pet stuff. And on and on.

Make sense?

Being organized isn’t about getting rid of everything you own or trying to become a different person, it’s about living the way you want to live..but better.” Peter Mellen

an alternative word and way to declutter - like goes with like

How Does it Work?

The idea is to create segmented spaces within the home where similar items “live” together.

And if you know where it “lives”, you’ll know where to find it!

Once that is accomplished, the next step is to go through each area and purge what no longer serves.

I have another favorite tool for this second step that I’ll be sure to share in a future post!

Stop Decluttering, Instead Make Space

In the meantime, if you’re longing to create more space in your life right now, this is a wonderful place to begin.

Start slowly. Pick one group of items at a time. Choose the place that type of item will “live” and move everything related to that space.

Take it step by step and you’ll begin to notice some fantastic progress!

Keep me posted! As always, I’m here for support!

​What about you? Do you have any favorite space-making tips that have worked for you?

Please visit my Facebook Page and join the conversation!

And check out this recent blog post you may enjoy!

The Story I’m Telling Myself Is…

Is there a story you’re telling yourself?

photo of phrase "The Story I'm telling myself is..."

The story I’m telling myself is…

We all do it, right?

We tell ourselves stories in our own heads.

A moment happens, and you fill in the blank and tell yourself the rest of the story.

A story that may be far from the truth, but this filling in the blanks with meaning and interpretation is such a habit, you don’t even know you’re doing it.

She never replied to my text.

He didn’t call back.

I’m the only one who…

They’re all on vacation together and I am…

We fill in the blanks of our lives, with the stories we tell ourselves in our own heads.

But if you become aware of this habit, if you can catch the stories before they build on themselves and start to anchor in as a belief, you begin to free yourself.

Just play with this.

Resist the urge to judge yourself.

And notice how many times these “stories” involve Negative Self-Talk.

Just notice and become aware of the moments when you begin to tell yourself a story…

a story that may be all your own fabrication! 🙏🌸❤️

The story I’m telling myself is…

What stories are you telling yourself?

I’d love to hear!

Want to play over on social, you can find me on , or