The Power of Gateless Writing

In the fall of 2021 I discovered the power of Gateless Writing when I received my Gateless Teacher Training Certificate.

“Founded by award-winning author and book midwife, Suzanne Kingsbury, Gateless Writing is a methodology that uses creative brain science, ancient Zen, and highly-effective craft tools + resources to move you beyond the conditioned, critical mind to a place of limitless creative potential beyond.”

There is so much about Gateless that I adore, but one of the core tenants that I stood out for me is…

No Disclaiming.

In the application of writing, “No Disclaiming” means that statements like… This isn’t really my best work…I’m not sure this will makes sense…I wasn’t really in the writing mood today… are all left unspoken.

Upon first learning and putting this concept into practice, I found disclaiming words longed to jump off my tongue and undermine my work before anyone else could possibly have the chance.

This isn’t very good… I couldn’t think of anything to write… I just quickly jotted down a few thoughts…

Sitting at that teacher training prepared to share my written work for the first time, my palms were sweating, I couldn’t keep my foot still and my throat had tightened up.

But without the ability to disclaim, all I could do was share myself and my work.

Share, and in turn, be open to receive.

And what an incredibly vulnerable and life-changing experience that proved to be.

Because I realized that not only did I disclaim my writing, I was also disclaiming myself in so many other areas of my life as well!

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Upon returning home from the teacher training, I started to notice all the moments throughout my day where I was disclaiming myself.

This is a new recipe I tried, but it might be awful…

I have an idea, but it’s probably stupid…

What I came to understand about this habit of disclaiming is that I was not only undermining my contributions to the world, but also blocking myself from receiving what others had to offer.

Does that resonate?

If so, here’s my invitation to you.

Notice the moments when you disclaim yourself.

As always, just notice. No judgement.

It’s natural when feeling vulnerable to try and self-protect. But play with this idea and see what happens when you resist the urge to disclaim


I’d love to hear your thoughts and feedback and if you give it a try, please let me know how it goes!

I have one coaching spot opening up in June!

If you’re intrigued and would like to learn what my coaching is all about and the ways in which your life will be changed, I’d love to offer you a complimentary session.

You can schedule a session here – Kasey Mathews Discovery Session

Women’s Lakeside Weekend Retreat June 2022

All the information for my Women’s Lakeside Weekend Retreat June 10th – 12th, 2022 held on the shores of Lake Todd, in Bradford, New Hampshire can be found here – June Women’s Lakeside Retreat! 

The dream of hosting a Retreat for Women has lived in and on my heart for Sometime, but I was always waiting for Someday.

Someday, when the time was just right… Someday, when the house was perfect… Someday, when I felt perfect…

Then with the onset of the global pandemic, that choice was taken away.

So I promised myself, when the choice for Someday returned, I would wait no more!

“Someday is now,”  has become my new mantra.

So… I am spreading my wings, launching my dream, and opening my heart and home to the women who also believe that…

Someday is now.

This intimate, lakeside workshop is for the woman who is ready to rediscover and reconnect with herself.

This retreat is for the woman who is ready to wake-up and listen to her inner-voice (That inner-voice has so much to say!)

This retreat is for the woman who knows she’s ready to take the best care of herself in order to show up in her fullness for those she loves.

This retreat is for the woman who is ready to recharge, renew and restore herself.

​All the details can be found here -If this speaks to your heart, I hope you’ll join.

Women’s Lakeside Weekend Retreat June 2022


Kasey Mathews host of Women's Lakeside Retreat Weekend in Bradford, N.H.

Is your heart saying Yes, but your head is saying, I still need to know more?

Check out this video that offers the itinerary of the entire weekend!

Women’s Lakeside Retreat Video

 

Mother’s Day Reflections

My Mother’s Day Reflections have been filling my heart and mind with peace and happiness.

It was such a treat to travel back to my childhood home and spend Mother’s Day with my Mom.

Pandemic life had kept visits far too infrequent and it felt amazing to finally gather and celebrate!

We went to one of my most favorite places in the world – The Syracuse Farmer’s Market!

I love wandering the aisles and allowing my senses to take in all the colors, textures, aromas and sounds of various accents and languages wafting on the breeze.

I’m also taken back to my younger years when I wandered those same aisles with a bag of popcorn spilling over in one hand and the other held in my grandmother’s.


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While at home, I was also able to attend a Mother’s Day church service. My Dad’s cousin, who married us – coming up on 26 years ago in June (!!) is head of the church.

It was a bustling, full weekend and although the church was in the wrong direction from my parent’s home, I felt so called to be there.

Midway through the service I understood why.

A beautiful young Mother was called up to share her Mother’s Day story.

She spoke of raising her three biological children and her seven foster children!

But before she shared that part of her story, she began with her own birth story.

“My mom was just half-way through her labor when I was born,” she said.

Instantly, chills covered me head to toe. Suddenly I knew exactly why I’d been guided and so determined to be there.

“I weighed just 1 pound 14 ounces… and my Mom was told I’d probably never walk or talk.”

Or…

Become the school principal that she is today, raising that gaggle of gorgeous little ones!!!

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Tomorrow, May 12th, 2022 is the 10 year anniversary of the publication of my Book, Preemie: Lessons in Love, Life and Motherhood. 

I wanted to do something big to celebrate, yet connecting with that Mom seemed like the perfect celebration.

It reminded me that this work isn’t about one single day. Instead, it’s about the ongoing work of uplifting and inspiring others every day.

That is the gift and opportunity this book has given me.


And speaking of inspiring and uplifting, is The Women’s Lakeside Weekend Retreat in June waiting just for YOU?

Designed to allow you to rediscover those long-forgotten and neglected parts of yourself, this retreat will leave you feeling nourished, seen, heard, loved, deeply cared for, relaxed, appreciated and so much more.

This Retreat will be the gift that keeps giving long after our time together. You can find all the details here – Lakeside Women’s Retreat 

Curious but uncertain? Simply reach out. I’m happy to answer any questions you may have!

I’d also love to hear hear how you spent your Mother’s Day!

Enjoy Your Life Now

If there is anything we’ve learned from the past two years experiencing a global pandemic is that we should enjoy life in the here and now. Why wait for someday when we now know how easily those somedays can be taken away?

Stop Putting Everything off till Someday

Fourteen years ago, when we found that empty farm house on a hill in rural New Hampshire, I stared out at the big back field, took my hubby’s hand in mine and said, “Wow, we could have an amazing party back there.”

And you know what? We never did.

Because there was aluminum siding to strip. There was painting to do. There were gardens to weed. And there were a gazillion other to-dos on that long list before the house was “done” enough to have a party.

Then, two years ago, with the onset of a global pandemic, the choice to have a party was taken away. Suddenly I found myself fully regretting all the parties and other moments in life I had let pass by.

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I’ve been watching the final season of the show This is Us. No spoiler alerts, just a moment of personal poignancy as I watched a scene with an older woman in failing health juxtaposed against her younger self, unaware of all that was to transpire in her life.

Sitting on my sofa, letting that realization sink in, I thought, “We just don’t know, do we?”

We didn’t know the upheaval, disruption and loss that the past two years would bring.

Yet now we do.

So perhaps it’s time to say YES to living life more fully while we can.

~~~~

A dear friend, after making a miraculous recovery from cancer, showed up in gorgeous skirts, dresses and jewelry every time I saw her.

One time I commented about how amazing she always looked. I share this story in my book, A Mom’s Guide to Creating a Magical Life.

You know, Kase,” she said, looking me right in the eye, “I had all these clothes hanging in my closet waiting for the party. Then I realized, this is the party.”

Enjoy Your Life Now – This is the party! 

What are you waiting for?

Someday is now. This is the party.

Too Much Stuff, Not Enough Space

Are you also dealing with too much stuff and not enough space in your house these days?

Is all that “stuff” weighing you down and keeping you from enjoying the Magic in your life?

Fear not, my friend! I have a quick, easy and fun solution to help you clear all that clutter from your life and reclaim your magic!

Where Did All This Stuff Come From?

Looking around our house lately, my eyes fall on overstuffed bookshelves, cramped closets, and messy drawers.

The question, “Where did all this stuff come from?” keeps playing on repeat in my head.

Spring has finally sprung here in the northeast, and I don’t want to be stuck inside my house getting rid of stuff, aka “decluttering”.

Instead, I want to be outside playing in my garden and enjoying the turn of the calendar in this season of rebirth and renewal.

But the good news is, I have a solution that allows me (and YOU) to do both!

The Tackle Too Much Stuff and Not Enough Space Solution

It’s a Feng Shui Space Clearing method that’s fun, quick, easy, effective and most importantly, allows for lots of time to spend the day doing whatever else brings you joy!

I write about this method, along with many other fun tips and tools in my book, A Mom’s Guide to Creating a Magical Life, which, by the way, makes an excellent Mother’s Day gift!

Here’s how it works:

For 9 days in a row, remove 27 items from your home.

That’s it. It’s that simple.

Give, donate or throw the items away. Up to you.

My Approach

I like to start with one room at a time, and if possible, focus on an even smaller space within the room, i.e. a single drawer or closet. I keep bins out in the garage so at the end of the space-clearing cleanse, I get rid of everything at once.

Why I love this method so much is the grace that’s inherent within the cleanse. In the past, when I’ve started “decluttering” I go on for hours at a time, and end up with piles of stuff in each room, feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, resentful and with so much more work to do.

(Check out my previous article – Clutter Clearing/Making Space Part 1 (if you missed that!)

But with this simple method, I quickly choose the 27 items to let go of and that’s it for the day. It usually takes 15-20 minutes tops. I’m left feeling lighter and satisfied, yet still full of plenty of energy to enjoy the rest of my day.

creating space through clutter clearing

If you’re looking for accountability and challenge, the method traditionally recommends getting rid of 27 items for 9 days in a row and if you miss a day, start back at day 1.

Yet, like everything in life, I believe you have to find what works best for YOU.

This is about you finding ways to achieve success and feel good about your achievement.

So if you choose to do 3 days, amazing! If you keep going and do 12, amazing, too.

There’s no right or wrong, this is about finding what works for YOU.

Listen to your heart and follow her lead.


I’d love to hear how it goes for you! Shoot me a message over on Instagram!

The Platter Exercise: How to Manage Your Stress, and the Stress of Others

At this current moment in time, there is a great deal of tension, stress and uncertainty in the world. Which is why it’s so important that you learn how to manage your stress and the stress of others. So today I’m sharing The Platter Exercise with you.

The Platter Exercise is an easy and important tool to keep handy in your stress management toolbox.

We’re all feeling the stress of the world right now.

And appropriately so, we’re turning to each other for support, counsel and a safe place to lean.

Yet, as much as you want to be there for others, you also want to ensure you’re not taking on other people’s stress, i.e. fears, angst, uncertainty.

How?

There are a variety of tools I share with clients in my coaching practice, but one of my personal favorites is what I call, The Platter Exercise.

Imagine I’m holding out a beautiful ceramic, platter in front of me. (Feel free to design your own.)

As a friend, family member, or stranger in the grocery checkout line shares their thoughts, woes, opinions, fears, i.e. STRESS, I allow all of THAT STRESS to rest on the metaphoric platter I’m holding in front of me.

Go ahead, pile it on,” I think to myself.

I hold that platter for them, knowing it can grow in size to accommodate.

a platter to hold other's stress

Free Yourself from the Stress of Others

After all the stress, angst and uncertainty have been piled atop this metaphoric platter, that is the moment for you and your companion to assess, analyze and advise as necessary.

Or maybe not.

Often just sharing all their stress is enough for your friend, family member or grocery store stranger to relieve themselves of their burdens, at least temporarily.

But here is THE KEY to the entire Platter Exercise and a step that should never be missed!

This is the vital piece that will free you up from taking on the stress of others. 

When the “platter exchange” is complete; when all that STRESS on the platter has been held and examined, the entire contents of the platter go back to the owner.

Let me repeat – Everything on the platter goes back to the owner of the original stress.

That way, You do not take on the stress of others!!!

It’s Up to Them

Then it’s up to them.

Do they want to take all that stress back on?

Perhaps. It’s up to them. But it’s not yours to take on.

Do they want to “let it all go”?

Perhaps. To drop the entire platter? Pick and choose a few items to keep? Let it all fly away into the ethers?

Again, it’s up to them. Not YOU.

None of this is yours to take on.

You have enough of your own stuff to carry.

They can choose to take the stress back on, let it fly away, or whatever, BUT THEIR STRESS IS NOT YOURS TO TAKE ON!

You have enough of your own stress in your life to carry, right?

The Platter Exercise is a kind and loving way to be fully present to others; to hold and hear what they have to say and honor what is theirs (not yours).

It’s a way to send the message that you trust and believe in them so much, that you know they can manage their own stress.

And Now for Your Stress

It’s not healthy to take on the stress of others, right? Because you already have enough of your own to carry?

So I have another wonderful tool to alleviate yourself from your own stress and all the burdens you may carry.

You can download my helpful (and free) tool here –

The Overwhelm Solution: 3 Simple Steps to Move from Overwhelm to Ease

In many ways, it’s like The Platter Exercise, but designed to help manage your own stress, rather than others.

​As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the tools and techniques I’ve shared, as well any of your own that you’ve found successful.

I’d also love to connect over on Instagram. 

Many Blessings!

Ask a Life Coach Any Question – What Would it Be?

Have you ever wondered, if I could ask a Life Coach any question, what would it be?

Well I have wonderful news for you, today is your lucky day!

Because I am a Life Coach and I would love to hear your question.

I am open for business and declare that…

Today is Ask a Life Coach Your Question Day!

Most often, over here on the blog, I work to offer words that I hope you find uplifting, inspiring, and hopefully entertaining!

But today, rather than try an guess what you may need, I’m going to take a more direct approach and ask you directly.

What do you need?

In what areas of your life are you needing support?

Now is your big chance to ask a question that will offer you more clarity, support, balance and direction.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you could ask me anything… about motherhood, writing a book, balancing life, work, relationships or ____________, or ______________ what would it be?

This is my offer to you.

What is the one question you’d like to ask?

The floor is yours.


Curious what it’s like to work with a Life Coach?

When we work together, I’m your partner in creating radical life-change. I’m just as committed to you living your dream life as you are.

Because I work from a holistic life coaching approach; meaning we examine all aspects of your life ~ physical, mental and emotional health, family and home life, career, financial well-being, life-partnerships and more, to discover areas of strength and weakness and how they all influence each other.

When one or more aspects of your life is “off” it has an impact on the wellness, wholeness and happiness of every area of your life.

As we touch on all aspects of your life and elevate your vibration, everything in your world elevates to match yours.

I approach my work from an intuitive life coaching perspective, utilizing my own advanced intuitive abilities and helping my clients develop their own.

When you’re able to more easily tap into your intuition, decision-making becomes easier and the path forward becomes more clear.

Because of this big picture approach, I often end up serving as a life and business coach for the women I work with.

Whether you’re struggling to find meaning in your career or want to find a way to have a bigger impact on the world, transformational life coaching will help.

Clients repeatedly report a new sense of freedom and possibility due to what they describe as my “uncanny ability to ‘see’ things that have been hidden beneath the surface” and holding them back.

If you’re intrigued and would like to explore my Life Coaching practice, you can schedule a complimentary 45-minute session here – Kasey Mathews Discovery Session 

 

Embrace Aging and Enjoy Life More

Aging has been on my mind lately. I’ve been thinking a lot about how to embrace aging and fully and truly enjoy life more at every age and stage.

Most often I publish my written pieces here on the blog, yet I was thrilled to have an article called, On Vanity and Vulnerability, in which I explore fears and anxieties around aging, published on Medium.com.

Here is a short excerpt –

“While recently looking into the round makeup mirror on the shelf in my closet, I noticed the emergence of vertical lines on my upper lip.

I don’t think they’re necessarily new, but my attention on them certainly is.

I started researching serums, creams, lotions and everything else I could do to remedy them.

Every time I looked in the mirror, they were the first, and nearly only thing I noticed.

On a recent walk in the woods, rather than seeing the evergreen on the trees and the brightness of the snow, I realized I was thinking about the lines on my upper lip.”

Feeling Vulnerable Sharing Anxiety about Aging

Putting those words out in the world induced feelings of great vulnerability and anxiety, and which, once you read the full article, you’ll understand how ironic that is.

And yet, after the article was published, I heard back from so many women who could relate to my struggles about aging and we’re so open and happy to share their own.

the photo that accompanied the article On Vanity and Vulnerability

It’s Time to Embrace Aging and Enjoy Life More

Once again I was reminded that there is so much comfort in knowing we are not alone.

Each and every day, we’re all a day older. For some of us, we’re farther along the path, and aspects of aging are challenging to contend with.

And yet, what a gift and blessing it is to wake each and every day, wrinkles and all!

You can read the article here – Kasey Mathews Medium.com

I’ll look forward to hearing your thoughts and feedback.


You may also enjoy this recent post on How to Feel Better About Yourself!

An Alternative Word for Decluttering

It’s that time of year again when folks are starting to talk about decluttering their homes. But I always get stuck on the word “decluttering” and like to use an alternative word instead.

An Alternative Word for Decluttering

Instead, I prefer the term “Creating Space”, not wanting to unintentionally invite clutter in with the decluttering!  You know what I mean?

Years ago, when we first moved to New Hampshire, I was in complete overwhelm and hired a professional organizer to help me navigate my way through the myriad of boxes and belongings.

Uncertain what this process would be like, I assumed we would just start “decluttering” by throwing things away.

But that wasn’t true at all!

Instead, I learned so much from her, most importantly, the fundamental first step to creating an orderly home that I have used ever since!

One of My Favorite Decluttering Making Space Tips

Ready? Here it is:

Like goes with Like

Meaning, all the sports equipment is in one place. Everything photography related lives together. All the holiday decorations in one place. Gardening in another. Art supplies. Books. Office supplies. Pet stuff. And on and on.

Make sense?

Being organized isn’t about getting rid of everything you own or trying to become a different person, it’s about living the way you want to live..but better.” Peter Mellen

an alternative word and way to declutter - like goes with like

How Does it Work?

The idea is to create segmented spaces within the home where similar items “live” together.

And if you know where it “lives”, you’ll know where to find it!

Once that is accomplished, the next step is to go through each area and purge what no longer serves.

I have another favorite tool for this second step that I’ll be sure to share in a future post!

Stop Decluttering, Instead Make Space

In the meantime, if you’re longing to create more space in your life right now, this is a wonderful place to begin.

Start slowly. Pick one group of items at a time. Choose the place that type of item will “live” and move everything related to that space.

Take it step by step and you’ll begin to notice some fantastic progress!

Keep me posted! As always, I’m here for support!

​What about you? Do you have any favorite space-making tips that have worked for you?

Please visit my Facebook Page and join the conversation!

And check out this recent blog post you may enjoy!

The Story I’m Telling Myself Is…

Is there a story you’re telling yourself?

photo of phrase "The Story I'm telling myself is..."

The story I’m telling myself is…

We all do it, right?

We tell ourselves stories in our own heads.

A moment happens, and you fill in the blank and tell yourself the rest of the story.

A story that may be far from the truth, but this filling in the blanks with meaning and interpretation is such a habit, you don’t even know you’re doing it.

She never replied to my text.

He didn’t call back.

I’m the only one who…

They’re all on vacation together and I am…

We fill in the blanks of our lives, with the stories we tell ourselves in our own heads.

But if you become aware of this habit, if you can catch the stories before they build on themselves and start to anchor in as a belief, you begin to free yourself.

Just play with this.

Resist the urge to judge yourself.

And notice how many times these “stories” involve Negative Self-Talk.

Just notice and become aware of the moments when you begin to tell yourself a story…

a story that may be all your own fabrication! 🙏🌸❤️

The story I’m telling myself is…

What stories are you telling yourself?

I’d love to hear!

Want to play over on social, you can find me on , or